Quick Fix

I am away from my office for a few weeks, wandering around near the water, doing a pretty good job of not thinking about those I left behind.

Down here I get to talk to friends, and friends of friends, and just see what they do and hear about what they think.  I don't have to do anything about it, which makes life much easier.

But what I hear can be pretty distressing, and that is, even more than before, people are going for the quick fix.  Psychotherapy seems to have lost some of its panache; it takes too long, it costs too much,  and it can be painful to think about the bad things, or to confront difficult problems.  These days it is much easier to find a life coach, a motivational speaker, a spiritual healing, an body-mind energy consultant, a brain-ionizer, a vitiman dispenser, or just a guru to show you the path.

Now, the quick fix has always had allure, for centuries.  But many years ago the fix seemed to be more through suffering, sacrifice and prayer.  Today it seems to be through self-indulgence, self-appreciation, fulfillment and money.  And who can say no to that.

The trouble is, of course, that the quick fix rarely works.  What these kinds of fixers seem to miss is that they are fighting against all of a person's biological history, genetics, family history, interpersonal history, cultural and sub-cultural patterns, and financial resources.

Usually the effects of a weekend pep-talk and a few exercises feels really good, and lasts for anywhere from three hours to three weeks, sometimes a couple of months.  But almost always, those entrenched thought and behavioral patterns creep back in and take over.

However, the bigger problem is, that psychotherapy also, often takes a great deal of time, and still isn't that effective.  That process too has to fight against all of a person's biological history, genetics, family history, interpersonal history, cultural and sub-cultural patterns, and financial resources. Some of these we can confront and work through, others, such as genetics, social class, finances and sub-culture, are often cannot be influenced by verbal interactions that happen in an office for an hour 9 now 45 minutes according to most insurance companies), a week.

There are things that I would strongly recommend that a coach can be necessary;

-- Sports

-- Financial planning

But, with both of those, be careful, find someone with a successful history, the longer the better, and make sure that what they said they did really happpened.