Finding a Therapist

Yes, finding a therapist can be very gratifying or very frustrating. Psychotherapy, despite all of the attempts at standardization and all the claims that it is a science, remains a craft that is practiced differently by everyone who attempts to do it.

One of the goals of psychotherapy is to help whoever submits themselves to the process to live a better, happier, more productive life. Now, what that means exactly, is up for grabs. That's why the profession attracts to many kooks, gurus, shamans, and yes, weirdos.

Everyone is seeking a better life. Some people are sure they have found it. When they feel that way they want to light the path for others, for both fun and profit.

Unfortunately, one person's path to self-actualizatin may be another person's mine shaft.

That's why training, contact with colleagues, and professionalism is important. No one, besides the therapist and his client, really knows what goes on inside that meeting room. Sometimes I tape sessions, and in the past I have been watched by other's, but 98% of the time I sit and talk to someone, the words, the gestures, the sighs, the raised eyebrow, the unfinsihed sentence, and the long silence, all vanish quickly into the past.

If you are looking for a therapist, make sure you feel comfortable, so that you will be able to say anything and everything that is really happening. In my sessions I appreciate complete honesty more than anything. If you drank again, tell me. We have to work on that. If you seduced your brother-in-law, let me know. It probably affects how you feel.

Make sure you feel understood. There were reasons you seduced your brother-in-law. It didn't just happen. It doesn't make you a bad person (don't ask your sister). We have to be able to talk about it.

Also, try to find out how much your therapist thinks about what he or she is doing and why. They shouldn't be just be winging the hour, or leaving the entire direction up to you. They should have a good idea of what they are trying to accomplish, and how they hope to get it done.

If they don't meet the criteria, you can find someone new, or tell them to contact me through this site. I charge for supervision, but it is well worth it.