It's a new month. I have to pay the bills from the practice; the rent, the water, the phone. I have to pay the bills at home. And it's a weekend, I have to clean and fix stuff, and I'm not good at fixing things.
I don't want to do it. I want to just start drinking and watch the Pats in their quest for perfection.
What still amazes me is how many people there are out there that don't do it. It varies from people who don't pay their taxes, to people who don't pay their bills, to people who don't clean up to people who just don't do anything.
It seems that almost every family has one. Someone, in their thirties, forties and up, who just have a room in the attic or the basement, or hang around the house and don't do anything. Sometimes they drink too much, but often they just can't cope, so they don't.
I'm not talking about people with cancer, or brain injury, or developmental disorders, I'm talking about people who are fairly intelligent,may or may not be friendly, but who somehow missed a beat, dropped out, and never got it back. Then they give up trying and expect that it's OK.
It takes so much energy from so many other people to drag these folks along. Usually, there is one parent who enables them, and always has. One parent who worries, and forgives, and gives just one more chance or one last gift of $50 to $50,000.
Bills, food, laundry, cars, hospitals, and on top of that melt-downs.
There are so many of these folks, but you hardly see them, because they don't come out. And no one talks about them because they are such an embarrassment.
I'm not sure of the solution, but they are frustrating to deal with in therapy. I have a few from some of the wealthiest families in this small city. Lonely, entitled, anxious, angry, and somehow missing the drive to fight their way out of it.
Usually, with some kind of excuse.
They wouldn't last long with Belichick.
3 comments:
I was married to one them. He just didn't do anything. Very bright likeable guy, could do anything he wanted and the older he got the less he wanted. Always could find someone who would take care of him. I never understood why he always wanted someone to pity him.Such a waste.
What about schizophrenia, bi-polar, and schizoaffective disorders? Which list would you put those on?
I always envy people who don't have to do anything... who have some kind of cushy 'arrangement' - with their parents. I find myself thinking "oh, what I would do with their setup! I could finally write all day!"
But then I think maybe having everything handed to me would have made me ... well.. not me...and I would end up just like them - sitting around with a bong in one hand, watching Judge Judy.
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