You've all been waiting for the next installment, so here it is.
I saw Laura this week and she came alone. She said that she has been totally free of all mind-altering substances, except caffeine, for six days. That means no alcohol, no nicotine, no Atavan, no Xanex,and no pot. Nothing.
She is also free of him. She gave him the challenge of joining her in not drinking. At first he said that he thought that was s stupid idea, but when he realized she wasn't going to see him unless he stopped, he agreed. (all this was done by email). But by the time he agreed she was sober enough to realize that he wouldn't be able to stick with it, even if he meant it.
So now, Laura has pulled it together. She dragged her son back into the house and threw out all his pot and all of his bongs. Together they are ripping up carpets and repainting walls. She is re-feathering her nest.
Done, done, done. Everything is over. She is beginning again. She is not even putting a profile on-line. She will just be by herself for... well, how long isn't clear.
If you see Laura, you will know immediately that she has designed herself to attract attention from men (not artificially, like the other woman I mentioned). If she is going to stay alone, she will have to work at it. The only time she has been without a man, or two, since fifth grade, was when her parents put her in a convent school to end the affair she was having with her English teacher. (He was one of those who encouraged her to write).
I would bet that she will successfully get rid of this guy. No more bouncing up and back (and up and down) with him.
Has she learned anything? Will the next relationship be different? Once she understands why she is attracted to losers will it help change her behavior?
Again, we will have to wait and see.
There will be another chapter. That's the great part of this business; there always is. It's not like a novel that comes to a nice ending, because in life, there is always the next day, even when there isn't much of a plot.
5 comments:
I'm cheering "Laura" on!
Thanks for the update, I am a sucker for "what happens next." Personally I don't think she'll make it...most do not. I hope she'll surprise us though.
I hope, for Laura's sake that the re-feathering of her nest is not just a repeat of the one before, for another bird of the same feather...
A long time ago, one of the two therapists I've seen, told me that I'm naturally predisposed to attract the same type of man over and over again...unless I make it a point to choose the exact opposite of what I instinctively gravitate toward...do you believe in that theory?
Well, I hope she makes it too, but that's not up to you or me or any of us here, is it? It's all on her.
I know when I had to give up my rapidly developing cocaine addiction back in the 80's, I had to give everything up...my friends, my employment, my residence, my room-mates, my lover, my life...as I knew it. Once again, we are back to opportunity costs...what we are willing to give up to get what we want. Good luck to you & Laura... please keep us posted.
There's nothing harder to do than change, to give up life as you know it, even if it was hell to begin with because, sadly, there is comfort in the predictable course. Cheering her on. Hoping for healing.
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