Back at work, and the pressure of cramming it all into three days still makes me uneasy. It gives me the luxury of being selective. I have to give some people more time between appointments. It forces me to choose even more; who to see and who to make wait. In many ways it's healthy for all of us. I can't just see people who want to unload on me. I want to put the time into those who will use the opportunity, whatever it is we do together, to move forward.
But so many people are so angry these days. There is such a feeling of distrust. People feel that their employer cannot be trusted, many are angry at the government, for reasons that are never clear, they are angry at the pressure they feel for money, with rising prices and stagnant wages. They are angry that so many people are angry. And everyone feels entitled to be angry in response.
For thirty years I have sat with couples who scream a each other, but now there are lines that are crossed much more often. Words are used that would never have been mentioned, very sharp verbal knives come out much quicker and cut much deeper. So many people seem to feel that relationships are just temporary. This city is very diverse, and yet this seems to cross many cultures. Men slip away; women are quick to pull back, they detach and give-up on the relationship quickly. It's not worth the effort to save it.
The drama of adolescents is much more intense also, and seems to be much meaner. Kids always found ways to put each other down and define a pecking order, and those on the bottom always suffered, but there seems to be a relentless need for some kids, often young girls, to destroy others, to drive them out of the group, to completely humiliate them. Everyone is at risk.
Tell me if I'm wrong. Maybe I just saw too many people today, after doing nothing yesterday. Nothing was kind of fun, but not very exciting. This is very exciting, but not really fun.
3 comments:
Exactly. That's why you need a hobby. Have you thought of painting? Photography? We're still waiting for the book to come out... :)
I have a silly theory about the phenomenon you describe. In the past, people knew exactly what was right and wrong. Usually because someone else (a priest) told them so.
In fact, they were so used to being told what to think and what to believe, they never learned how to do it themselves.
So, after 2 horrible world wars and nuclear power, nobody really knows what's right and wrong anymore, even if they say they still believe in what the priest says.
I think people will eventually figure it out...or not. Either way it will be a very painful transition.
I have definitely been frustrated by this sense of distrust and aggression that seems to be growing across age groups. Your experience with adolescents especially resonates with me. These issues of aggression, power dynamics, conduct issues, and growing disrespect/anger weigh on my heart, but I'm still learning what role and impact I can play for my patients as a pediatrician, but also for my community as a member of society. Thanks for sharing!
I have nothing interesting to add but I am reading and appreciate the post
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